This Side of Heaven

On January 26th, 2008, we celebrated Paul’s 83rd birthday, as we had celebrated his birthdays so many times over the years, but Paul was subdued and so was the party. Two days later, however, was Paul and Joanne’s fiftieth wedding anniversary—their last—and the party this time was cheerful and celebratory. Paul and Joanne reveled in interacting with an intimate group of family and old friends. The way they jointly cut the first piece of cake was a moment of happiness for all of us.

And then, putting aside the cake knife, Paul took both of Joanne’s hands in his and drew her close to him. They looked at each other with intimate conspiracy, a look of endearment for those fifty years, and Paul said, “Joanna, being married to you has been the joy of my life.”

(Source: apaullo, via recollective)

I’ve repeatedly said that for people who have as little in common as Joanne and myself, we have an uncommonly good marriage. We are actors. We make pictures and that’s about all we have in common. Maybe that’s enough. Wives shouldn’t feel obligated to accompany their husbands to a ball game, husbands do look a bit silly attending morning coffee breaks with the neighborhood wives when most men are out at work. Husbands and wives should have separate interests, cultivate different sets of friends and not impose on the other … You can’t spend a lifetime breathing down each other’s necks … We are very, very different people and yet somehow we fed off those varied differences and instead of separating us, it has made the whole bond a lot stronger. —Paul Newman

(Source: mattybing1025, via factoseintolerant)

ofsmokyburgundy:

Paul Newman’s letter to his wife on their wedding day: “ Happiness in marriage is not something that just happens. A good marriage must be created. In the Art of Marriage, the little things are the big things. It is never being too old to hold hands. It is remembering to say ‘I love you’ at least once a day. It is never going to sleep angry. It is at no time taking the other for granted; the courtship should not end with the honeymoon; it should continue through all the years. It is having a mutual sense of values and common objectives. It is standing together facing the world. It is forming a circle of love that gathers in the whole family. It is doing things for each other, not in the attitude of duty or sacrifice, but in the spirit of joy. It is speaking words of appreciation and demonstrating gratitude in thoughtful ways. It is not expecting the husband to wear a halo or the wife to have the wings of an angel. It is not looking for perfection in each other. It is cultivating flexibility, patience, understanding and a sense of humor. It is having the capacity to forgive and forget. It is giving each other an atmosphere in which each can grow. It is finding rooms for things of the spirit. It is a common search for the good and the beautiful. It is establishing a relationship in which the independence is equal, dependence is mutual and obligation is reciprocal. It is not only marrying the right partner, it is being the right partner.”

Aw. That totally made me happy and weepy at the same time. What a grand marriage they must have had. *sniff*

I just want a love like Paul Newman and Joanne Woodward had.

“We bought a bed which we found in an antique shop [during the filming of The Long Hot Summer], and it was quite large for a brass bed. The antique dealer said the reason it is that large is it was made for a whore house. I was so excited by that I said, oh my heavens, I have to buy this! Which I did, and it’s up stairs in our bedroom. We’ve had it ever since.” - Joanne Woodward

(Source: twelvevacancies, via flutie)

stardustmelody:

Interviewer: What’s the secret to your marriage?

Paul Newman: I don’t know what she puts in my food.

(via recollective)